See the above picture? One of those people is my lovely wife who chose to march with some friends in the gay pride parade in St. Louis. I was not there. I stayed at home and watched the NASCAR race. I would have gone except for one thing – all the gays. Now before you start accusing me of homophobia, let me explain. I have absolutely no problem with whom someone chooses to fall in love or have sex with. And I have no problem with lesbians at all. I am talking about the way over the top, ultra-flamboyant, deck of the Titanic gay men. They’re just sooo annoying. And when you get a lot of them together at an event, say maybe a parade, it’s time for them to let loose, upping the annoying factor to 11. You know how straight guys act when their team wins a championship? Annoying right? We run around screaming, setting stuff on fire, and generally making huge asses of ourselves. The parade is like gay Superbowl, only it smells better.
Here is the other thing that kept me away – I don’t care enough about cause to make me want to walk in a parade. There is nothing in my life that I am so into I feel the need to walk down asphalt on a hot summer day. Unless they have a parade for beer, pizza and blowjobs then I’m staying on the couch. Unless at the end of the parade there is no beer, pizza, or blowjobs then I will pass on that too.
Here is the other thing that kept me away – I don’t care enough about cause to make me want to walk in a parade. There is nothing in my life that I am so into I feel the need to walk down asphalt on a hot summer day. Unless they have a parade for beer, pizza and blowjobs then I’m staying on the couch. Unless at the end of the parade there is no beer, pizza, or blowjobs then I will pass on that too.
3 comments:
I am not so unsure there were not blowjobs at the end of the parade on Sunday!
And the Lesbians might have enjoyed the beer and pizza.
Now, I'm like spamming your blog.
But...one of the funniest thing I ever saw was at the Pride Parade a few years ago. During the parade, most of the businesses along the parade route on South Grand are open, including the Commerce Bank across from City Diner. In addition, many of the queens are driven along in classic cars.
Well, we are standing at City Diner watching the festivities when we see a "not anywhere near new, but also not in the realm of classic cars" beat up Chevy in the parade route. Anyway, these two stoner dudes have just realized they made a wrong turn and ended up in the middle of the Gay Pride Parade.
The horror on their face was classic. If only I had my Flip camera then!
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